Dear Super Fun Patrol,
I ran into a bit of trouble the other night when I was voting. Apparently it’s unacceptable to use your cell phone while placing your votes. I was asked to leave because I refused to hang up on my mother.

My mother is very old and she would think the worst if I didn’t let her go on and on about her TV problems. I’ve wrapped tinfoil around the broken rabbit ears to better increase reception and sometimes I think its working. Other times it might just be the weather.

I was frustrated when I was asked to leave so I waited in my car outside the polling place so I could have a word with the little old lady that yelled at me. I’m sure she would understand the situation with my mother and her TV. My goal was to prevent other voters from having to hang up on their mothers. Somehow she ended up in my trunk. I’m looking at her now as I right this. I’m somewhere deep in Wayne county…I must have been driving for hours. I want to discuss the situation with her in more depth but I’m afraid she might react badly. What a crazy night.

I need to talk some sense into her. What should I say? My arms are tired from digging and I’m afraid I have a short fuse right now. I’m really confused.

It would seem, yet again, that time is of the essence.

Gabe Poppi