Sag Review: "Speed Racer"

It was absolutely amazing.  It was everything it should be.   Insane visuals, cartoon physics, crazy action, hot anime women, fast cars...  With the exception of one downer.  The "hit you over the head" moment because of the inability of the audience to live in suspense of the identity of Racer X.  Do we really need everything spelled out for us?  Is there any room for speculation any more?  How about mystery? 

Fuck you, American public and fuck you, to the producers that are slaves to the American public! 

Here is my audience critique.  There were a bunch of kids so it was fucking annoying, but I'm willing to cut some slack because it is a kids movie.  I do have to comment on this one instant.  Spritle flipped another character off before stepping into an elevator.  I heard a kid exclaim immediately: "What does that mean!?!"  The father said: "It is not for you to know about."

So here is what I don't understand.  Computer animated kids movies = gold right?

Chicken Little - 135 million
Finding Nemo - 339 million
Happy Feet - 198 million

Speed Racer's 2nd week totals are almost to 30 million.  It cost 120 million to make that mother fucker.  What the hell is wrong with you people?  120 million?  Really?  I know there was a monkey and a lot of explosions, but come on guys.  Where the hell is the audience?  I thought all you had to do is make an animated feature and it was 100 million guaranteed?

For people who are Speed Racer fans in the first place, this movie gets 4 and a half "dicks in the ass"® out of 5 asses.  It would have gotten 5 "dicks in the ass"® if not for the Racer X reveal.

Go out and see it.  Don't let "Happy Feet" trump "Speed Racer".