Adios, Captain Planet!

Kill kill kill.

Maim. Also Kill.

The Planet.

That’s what’s happening, folks – global death, not, as some say, warming.

The planet is kicking the bucket and we’re helping it shuffle off it’s earthly coil.

But, I don’t particularly care because instead of doing something about it, all we are doing is arguing over whether it’s a new ice age, or global warming, or climate change or cosmic log flume.

I have an idea – people who don’t believe that global warming is happening should move to the Equator for a few months. Then one day, we snatch them up and plop them in Antarctica with the Emperor Penguins who ravish them with icicles.

We also fire all the damn hippies off a 5-story roof into a vat of soap.

Turdhats.